Earlier, I talked about fashion and dating, but now how about fashion and peers?
Not many people at work know that I blog about fashion. They know I’m into fashion as they always jibe me about not wearing the same thing twice blah blah blah. Furthermore, I’m rather reluctant to let them know about it just in case they think it’s a conflict with my work or they just won’t get it and make fun of me for talking so loftily about a skirt or a pair of shoes. The thing is, I imagined all the pre-conceptions that my colleagues might have about fashion seeing as they’re mostly lads who are typical FHM/Maxim readers and fashion to them could mean buying a Gucci/CK/Louis Vuitton/Tiffany’s something for their birds. (UK-INT traslation – birds = girls).
Well, one of them randomly decided to Google my name and because my profile on here used to state my full name as opposed to Susie Bubble, the office managed to stumble onto my blog as the message was past around. As soon as I knew, I could feel my cheeks burning up and I had no idea why. I know I’m not ashamed about fashion, I know I’m not ashamed about my blog. I have varying degrees of pride for both. It sounds really silly but it’s like I want to portray a certain image about myself when I’m at work, that I’m efficient, hardworking and dedicated. Somehow, I feel that, them knowing that I have a fashion blog might change all of that make them associate me with a stigma that is unfortunately attached to fashion as an interest – that it’s an airhead thing, that its a superficial thing that is entirely materialistic. Thus far, those who have seen the blog have had a positive reaction to it which is a relief and it’s awful that I didn’t give my colleagues enough credit which begs the question why I had doubts in the first place.
Do I get moments of shame for my passion for fashion? Embarrassed to say that fashion is my hobby (as opposed to a sport, or bird-watching….)? I have to say unfortunately – yes, I do and my doubts are born out of a very fashion-hostile background. When I was at uni, and made little slip-ups like dropping a pile of books in the library or turning up for class late, I could almost see people raise eyebrows at me and my outfitS and put two two and two together. As in ‘Oh god….a fashion airhead who stumbled her way into a Russell Group university!.’
This post doesn’t seem to be heading towards anywhere positive but there is light at the end of the tunnel. The light is that writing Style Bubble has helped me to overcome some of those niggling doubts I have about enjoying fashion. Furthermore, it is only 1% of the time that these doubts surface. I would be interested to know though if other people experience similar negative reactions towards their interest in fashion from other people or even yourself. Perhaps if you live in a place where fashion is not seen as a priority, you’re not so forthcoming about letting people know you’re into fashion. Or if you think I’m being a complete idiot for thinking this way – that’s cool too. Discussion more than welcome!
Well it’s mostly live let live with my friends. We all know that we have our own interests. But there is this one friend who said something pretty offensive to me the other day: “.. Well, your style is really anything I WOULDN’T wear, no, no it’s nothing bad it’s just you make some weird choices sometimes.”
This of course coming from an AE fiend.
I’m not exactly a 100% fashionista but I love Jeisa so I started an online fansite. Before coming up with the site, I used to visit a really good Jeisa fansite where her photos/campaigns/etc get posted regularly but the owner decided to stop. I felt the need to do something about it so despite my low fashion IQ, I decided to put up the fansite. Now, it feels weird that I get so excited when fashion weeks all over NY, Milan, Paris and Brazil come up! LOL. I know people who know me might raise their eyebrows when I talk about fashion but what the heck, I’m loving it now and I’m still learning to at the same time.
That’s a very interesting point you raised Susie. Whilst my work mates are all fashion savvy, dj-types (and all male), I actually feel it’s my DUTY to dress with an ‘edge’, and my own expensive handbag addiction is stuff of legend around my office, therefore I have no embarassment about my love of fashion and infact I think the boys rather like it, maybe even slightly intimidated by it. However, the times I do feel slightly embarassed is, strangely, just walking down the street. Whilst I do not dress overly avant garde, I do still attract attention from ‘ordinary’ types and this is when I gently curse myself for not being ‘just normal’. I feel that people perceive me as being snobby or out somehow out-of-touch with reality. Although I rarely feel that I am perceived as an airhead I have to say. I dunno, it’s odd. Luckily most of my friends are also into fashion so I can go out mob handed if necessary!
I work in a pretty serious academic setting. I look around me and wonder if these people actually have real lives. If I found out one of them blogged about fashion, I would have a newfound respect for them! It’s great if you are good at your job. But it makes you interesting if you’ve got something else going on outside of it. I’m willing to bet that the positive reactions you are getting from your co-workers are because they’re thinking the same thing I’m thinking.
And, you know what? I know some really intelligent people who are into fashion! You should meet the people I talk to about “America’s Next Top Model!” Also, remember that Miuccia Prada has a PhD!
I have experienced a similar feelings, but what happened to you at work does sound embarrassing, partly because so much attention was focused on you. I haven’t gone to university yet but hope there will be at least some likeminded people I can share my thoughts with as I seem to manage to convert people around me
susie,
i completely understand how you feel. i am an honour’s english graduate who usually hangs around with the intellectual sort and consider myself to be one on occasion as well. however, and this is a pretty big however, i am the only one who sees fashion as an art form, as a way of expressing yourself further than just the words you speak or what you do for a living. i see fashion as an extension of one’s self. and when i start going on about it or trying to explain that style isn’t really about the clothes you wear; i end up feeling a bit, well, lacking. as if style or fashion doesn’t really exist on the same level as other topics. and of course, it doesn’t and shouldn’t, but i do think it a valid ‘hobby’ and a valid interest. see? we all get that feeling some times… but, i don’t fight it anymore. at least, i speak up a bit louder now when people ask “wait, you have a blog?”
well, my friends have jokingly called me vain and my boyfriends sometimes complain about my style, which is very little-girlish and full of buttons and buckles and mixed prints, and express disbelief and barely-surpressed joy if i show up anywhere in a pair of jeans. this bothered me for a long time and i used to wear boring things on purpose so that i didn’t look like i was too into my appearance. but you know what? hang it! it’s not that i’m into my appearance–it’s that i’m into clothing and details and the way i can put pieces together in a way that makes me feel good and sunny and like i want to go out and show everybody something i made. sorry if it’s an outfit and not, like, a stencil or something.
First of all excuse my bad english, I’m swedish and second, I’ve been reading your blog from the beginning(I actually followed you from mystylediary..)and I have to say thank you so much for writing such an interesting blog with insightful posts that is truly a delight to read. You seem special in the best possible sense of the world!
And then to the actual toppic. I’m a student and the people surrounding me is not at all into fashion. Some might think they are, but really they’re not. This always makes me feel very unforfortable, like I have to watch my tongue. I live and breathe fashion. I do constantly want to make little inpasses or comments on fashion because as I’ve said it’s such a big part of my life. But I know they wouldn’t get the way I look at fashion and would probably just think I’m a superficial girl who likes to shop(wich is really not at all what fashion is about to me). This doesn’t make me care less about fahion in any way but i just think it’s sad how fashion is often looked upon, like if some guys hobbie is fishing- that isn’t really saving the world either but still it’s considered far more okey for him to talk about that than for me to talk about fashion…
i completely relate. i suppose being interested in fashion is connected to being vain or not very cerebral. i do admit that when i spend too much money on clothes, i don’t feel very intelligent about doing that. but i don’t see anything intelligent about not caring about your clothes either.
I feel exactly the same way. I just graduated from a high school in Dayton, Ohio. I was accepted to the fifth best journalism program in the country, and turned that down in order to attend the Fashion Institute of Technology. Needless to say, the widespread perception of my intelligence dwindled after that. The group of peers which I associate with are some of the most intelligent students in schoo, so none of them really understood my decision to do something so…trivial, in their minds. Not only was my decision regarded as silly, but my complete sense of fashion as well. I come from a state where Abercrombie and Fitch reigns supreme, where tucking your jeans into Uggs is considered couture. My own experiences have been a little more negative, but I have come to believe that a love for fashion is just as valid as a love for anything else. If it makes you happy, and no one is suffering because of it, then go ahead and do it!
I feel exactly the same way. I just graduated from a high school in Dayton, Ohio. I was accepted to the fifth best journalism program in the country, and turned that down in order to attend the Fashion Institute of Technology. Needless to say, the widespread perception of my intelligence dwindled after that. The group of peers which I associate with are some of the most intelligent students in schoo, so none of them really understood my decision to do something so…trivial, in their minds. Not only was my decision regarded as silly, but my complete sense of fashion as well. I come from a state where Abercrombie and Fitch reigns supreme, where tucking your jeans into Uggs is considered couture. My own experiences have been a little more negative, but I have come to believe that a love for fashion is just as valid as a love for anything else. If it makes you happy, and no one is suffering because of it, then go ahead and do it!
Like you, a lot of the time I too am embarassed about my liking for fashion… In Sheffield (where I live), a lot of the inhabitants are the “pair of tracksuit bottoms and an addidas jacket” level, where fashion means a mini-skirt from New Look or some emo boots, when I cross the line from dressing acceptably to being esoteric and fashion forward, I receive an alarming amount of glares and I can see on people’s faces that they have already built up a preconception of me, that I am strange, pretentious and think of myself as being superior to them.
My family deplore my fashion habbits too. They see intelligence/studying as being in direct conflict with fashion, that they’re mutually exclusive. When I dress more esoteric, they accuse me of slacking on the studying front and being an empty facade.
When I visit my old friends, I feel like I need to keep my love for fashion a secret as they have known me before I became interested in fashion. I don’t want them to feel like I have changed (as I have not – fashion has just become an extension to the things I was and still am) and don’t fit into their preception anymore. I don’t want them to feel like they’re not close to me anymore and expend all their time laughing at my “superficiality”. But at the end of the day, I think that fashion is a form of self-expression, just like the music you listen to, or the opinions that you hold, and there is nothing wrong with expressing yourself well on that front. Besides, when I dress my way, I definitely feel more uplifted and chirpy, and hey, I only live once, so I might as well live it gaily and cheerily!
Woh, sorry for the essay! I didn’t realise that I’d harped on for THAT long!
Well, I get more stares at uni, where i’m supposed to be in a more artistic environment (as I study art history), than at work. At uni I’ve been called crazy, superficial etc. At work it seems that the people that like me also like my style, whereas the one’s that don’t agree with the way I dress just let me know. Fortunatelly they’re a minority. But the biggest problem is on the street and on public transport: last year, on the bus, some guy just felt the need to pull me by my boho earings…and I’m not mentioning all the comments and stares I get. But I guess it’s worth it….!
I absolutely understand. In fact, I posted about it a few days ago:
http://styletribe.jealousofyouth.com/2006/06/villainous-fashion.html
I don’t tell anyone that I run a fashion blog. Even most of my friends don’t know, though it certainly wouldn’t surprise them. It’s not that I’m ashamed, but simply that I don’t want to go through the trouble of defending myself. And needing to defend oneself is almost inevitable.
i definitely symphatize. like another poster mentioned, fashion is not just “clothes,” it’s an art form (in the sense that it’s beautiful and an expression vehicle) that you also get to wear. i don’t find it superficial at all. imo, that would be akin to saying paintings, sculptures, architecture, etc are superficial. other than sometimes feeling i leave impressions on people of being the airheaded, material-obsessed type, i’ve also found that people tend to think i’m carefree about my money and how i spend it, as if mom and dad spoil me and i don’t know what money means except that it gets me nice clothes. i must admit my parents dote on me alot, but i also happen to be a very good budgeter, make some of my spending money, and also tend to wait for things i like to go on sale (lol). but it’s hard to tell people this, even my own friends, so i just don’t bother and let them figure it out for themselves.
I think this post has illicited some very eloquent mini-essays from you guys! Thanks for contributing your little fashion tales of woe and encouragement. Many of you have bought up the point of trying to justify fashion as an artform, as something that goes beyond spending money at a shopping mall. I think it is very important to diferentiate people who are interested in SHOPPING and people are genuinely interested in fashion. Yes, they do go hand in hand at times but neither are they one and the same. I too don’t like the fact that people make assumptions about my spending habits when they heard the word ‘fashion’. First off, it doesn’t take money to be interested in fashion or fashionable/stylish for that matter. It does sound like most of us here are well-grounded enough to realise not to give two hoots about what people think and perhaps, if people don’t get it, that’s no great loss. All the more encouraging for us to indulge in our ‘hobby’.
I know exactly what you mean when you say, “Somehow, I feel that, them knowing that I have a fashion blog might change all of that make them associate me with a stigma that is unfortunately attached to fashion as an interest – that it’s an airhead thing, that its a superficial thing that is entirely materialistic.”
I am a philosophy student, I’m well-read, I keep up on current events and politics, but I still can’t help but feel unfairly labeled because of my fashion blog.
It’s interesting to me because recently I came “out” as a blogger… I print it on my business cards, I put my real name on my blog, and I started making more real life connections through the blog.
It’s mixed. Some people get it, some don’t. Some find it intimidating or have any number of misconceptions. Others are curious. It’s been good to come out, and I’m no longer embarrassed about it. I think it can be a very powerful tool, and a lot of fun too. It’s always uncomfortable at the cutting edge, but hey, that’s why we’re all here =D
Great comments from everyone. Thanks as always Susie!
i guess i just want to say i know what you mean; it does worry me that, not even being particularly into fashion, but just dressing differently gives people a certain perception of you. my yearbook ‘what if’ said: ‘what if hoyan wasn’t so artsy?’ and i feel like that was just a mindless comment on my appearence, as opposed to my personality. nonetheless i suppose we should give our peers the benefit of the doubt…after all, your colleagues were very positive about your blog! i only hope we can all be so lucky.
hey susie, been reading your blog for a while now. Am completely put to shame by how furiously you blog and your techno know-how. One day we must have coffee and you can show me how to put pictures on my blog! Very impressed by standard of your writing and fashion know-how too!
I’ve been blogging for just over a year now and I completely know where you’re coming from. I have a degree in economics, history and politics from Durham uni, I used to be senior management for a top blue-chip company, and I am so proud of myself for recently setting myself up as a stylist and personal shopper, yet I still feel lilke people are going to laugh at me when I tell them what I do. And, I think that they will judge me for having a ‘frilly, girlie job’. In reality, no one I’ve told has judged me negatively, in fact I’m my harshest critic. Most people are really interested and want to learn more. Yet despite this I still blog with a secret name and feel slightly self-conscious about working in the fashion industry. Go figure!!
this is a good one. my last career was as a videograoher/editor. the last thing i did was co-direct a documentary on american foreign policy. it took 3 years, and deadened me and i went back to fashion, an earlier career. the adjustment has been wierd. now it is ok that i dress up, although it should never have detracted before but it was still a battle to be taken seriously. it is now good to have someone comment about my looks. what i do is considered feminine [?!?!?!?!] i was so tough before. my film friends are actually at a loss for words when i tell them i quit film. they still think i am just dabbling in this. but i’m not. i was tired of screens, and a non-tactile tough somewhat regurgatative world. i didn’t go further into fashion when i was younger because i did find the modelling world silly. but silly is good and beauty is powerful, and frivolity is a serious business too.
Sounds like you need therapy or something?!?
Why do all this thinking about fashion when you can just get on with it! Such a waste of time and a post IMO.
^ That was a rather rude post.
Anyway, my love of fashion has only really garnered positive reactions from friends. I’ve gotten stares from strangers, but the “academic” group of friends I spend time with seems to like that I have an artistically inclined interest in fashion. Maybe it’s just Southern California, but people here seem to appreciate style that is not ground in Juicy Couture tracksuits and flip-flops. I guess seeing even sillier “fashionistas” makes avant-garde and somewhat intellectual style a hot commodity in comparison.
>>but silly is good and beauty is powerful, and frivolity is a serious business too.
I love this.
As always, thanks for the post Susie. Great discussion here.
I think I need to compile a ‘Fashion is Positive’ quote book from all the comments that have been submitted here. Seriously – so many quotable things!
fAsHiOn iZ aRt !….SiMpLy! SuSsI GiRl u gOt tO Be pRoUd oF WhAt’S Ur dO’N!….U HAd iNsPiErEd mE In MaNy wAYz…i’m A GraPhIc dEsIgN StUdEnT aNd mOsTlY DiD mOsT oF My wOrK AbOuT FaShIoN ImPacTz!…SuRe tHaNx tO Ur BlOg…aNd sEc. I LiVe iN A PlaCe wHeRe FaShIon iS EvRY ThInG!…WhErE U HaVe to hAvE uR OwN StYlE To lIvE!….BuT StIlL..i’tS hArD To Be oRiGiNaL If ThE SoCiEtY Is iMpOsSiNg a lOt oF prEsSeR On wHo yOu sHuLd drEsS!…sO LiVe Up To it!…uR Gr8….;***
Really insightful post.
The only person who looks negatively upon my interest in fashion has to be my mother. (ironic as she was in the industry–or maybe justified) Here in suburban NJ, clothes are a bit of a priority– or at least, dressing stylishly doesn’t hurt. When I was a kid going from 4th-7th grade, I was never the best dressed or even close to the nicest dressed. The girls who were not necessarily the best dressed- but had the nicer clothes? Well, they were further up the social ladder. That’s how I learned style doesn’t hurt.
Of course, it’s always best to be smart and fashionable at the same time. (like you!) But I’ve learned though I feel guilty about liking fashion sometimes (I actually talked about that in my newest post) I’m not ashamed of it. About telling people I have a fashion blog- I probably wouldn’t tell someone I just met about it, but I don’t hestitate to tell my friends. I wear the most unusual outfits to school sometimes so the people that should know already know that I do take an interest in clothes. (although now that it’s summer I’m just bumming around the house in something abhorably unstylish- sh.. right now I have on a green tank and flouresecent orange nike shorts)
Sorry, a bit unrelated – but Go0jEe I find your upper and lower-case mixed message exeptionally hard to read. I’m a graphic designer and I’m saying that’s very typography!! Shame on you! Back of the class! LOL!!!